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Question

Unfortunately since I was small I have had the habit of swearing by Allah whether I am telling the truth or not. I have tried to give up this bad habit and I believe that I am now following the right path. My question is: what is the ruling on the oaths I have sworn in the past? What should I do so that Allah will forgive me? Should I offer expiation for each oath? But the problem is that I cannot know how many oaths I swore. Please advise me, may Allah reward you with good.

Praise be to Allah.Oaths are of three types: 

A binding oath . This is an oath which a person means and is sure about, referring to something in the future which he resolves to do or not do. The ruling on this is that expiation is obligatory if the oath is broken.

Ibn Qudamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 
“Whoever swears to do something and he does not do it, or he swears not to do something and he does it, must offer expiation.” There is no difference of opinion concerning this matter among the jurists. Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: The vow for which expiation is due, according to the consensus of the Muslims, is that concerning actions in the future.” (Al-Mughni, 9/390) 

Unintentional oaths. This refers to swearing when there was no intention of making an oath. No expiation is due on such oaths , because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Allah will not call you to account for that which is unintentional in your oaths, but He will call you to account for that which your hearts have earned. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most-Forbearing.” [Al-Baqarah 2:225]
`Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said: This verse, ‘Allah will not call you to account for that which is unintentional in your oaths’, was revealed concerning saying, “No, by Allah’ and “Yes, by Allah.” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 4613) 
Whoever swears to something thinking that it is as he has sworn it to be, then finds out that it is otherwise, does not have to offer expiation according to the majority of scholars. This comes under the heading of unintentional oaths. 
Ibn Qudamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 
“Whoever swears to something thinking that it is as he has sworn it to be, when that is not the case, does not have to offer expiation, because this is a kind of unintentional oath. Most of the scholars are of the view that no expiation is required for this kind of oath. Ibn al-Mundhir said: This was narrated from Ibn 'Abbas, Abu Hurayrah, Abu Malik, Zurarah ibn Awfa, al-Hasan, al-Nakha’i, Malik, Abu Hanifah and al-Thawri. 
Those who said that this is an unintentional oath were: Mujahid, Sulayman ibn Yasar, al-Awza’i, al-Thawri and Abu Hanifah and his companions. 
Most of the scholars are of the view that no expiation is required for an unintentional oath. Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: the Muslims are unanimously agreed on that. 
That is because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Allah will not call you to account for that which is unintentional in your oaths.” [Al-Baqarah 2:225] This comes under that heading, because he did not intend to give a wrong impression, so it is as if he broke the oath by mistake. (Al-Mughni, 9/393) 

Swearing falsely concerning something that is in the past. This is a major sin, and there is no expiation for it according to the majority of scholars because it is too serious to be expiated. 

If this is understood, then if the oaths that you swore were binding oaths that you broke, so you have to offer expiation. 
If you have forgotten how many oaths there were, then do your best to remember and offer expiation based on what you think is most likely to be the case, then you will have absolved yourself. 
Whatever of these oaths had to do with doing a certain action, or refraining from a certain action, only one expiation is required in each case. For example, if you swore that you would not speak to So and So, then you broke that oath and did not offer expiation, then you swore again not to speak to him, and you broke the oath again, you only have to offer expiation once. This is different from the case if you had sworn not to speak to him, then you swore not to eat his food, for example. In that case you would have to offer expiation twice. We have already discussed this in detail in the answer to question no. 34730 .  
To sum up, with regard to the oaths that you swore to do something or not to do something in the future, and you broke them, you have to offer expiation for them. 
With regard to oaths that you swore falsely saying that you did something in the past or did not do it, and you were lying, there is no expiation to be offered, but you have to repent to Allah, and Allah accepts the repentance of those who repent.  May Allah help you and forgive your sin.
And Allah knows best.

Question

I know that punishing oneself and depriving oneself is effective in encouraging oneself to do good, but how can I punish myself?

Praise be to Allah.The believer who is keen to save himself will strive to save himself from everything that may lead to his doom, and he is kind to himself. Part of that kindness is taking care of one’s relationship with Allah so that he will be saved from the punishment of the Hereafter, and striving to make himself do that which is enjoined upon him and to avoid that which is forbidden to him, seeking thereby the pleasure of Allah. So he starts by repenting from all sins, and urging himself to compete in doing righteous deeds, and striving to reach high levels of faith, by applying the appropriate means, such as learning about the rewards for good deeds, the effects and causes of sin, keeping away from those who discourage him and are lacking in ambition, listening to stories of those who strive in worship. Then if he weakens in doing righteous deeds or commits sin, or finds that he is inclined towards it, this is the time for punishment.  
Punishment comes after learning the truth and deviating from it. You should not start with punishment because there is no punishment before knowledge and knowledge leaves no excuse.  
You should also note – may Allah bless you – that punishment should not be sought as an end in and of itself, rather it is a means of disciplining the self. This is like cauterization for one who is sick, which is only used as much as is necessary. 
It is not good to punish yourself and burden yourself with more than you can bear, or with things that cause physical harm, such as burning yourself with fire or standing in the sun, etc. Rather punishment should take the form of obliging yourself to do more righteous deeds, without causing too much hardship, or depriving yourself of things that you like. However, you know yourself best and you know what makes you more lazy and pushes you towards sin, and you should avoid these things.  
Al-Maqdisi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 
If the believer checks himself and sees some shortcoming or he commits some sin, he should not take the matter lightly, for that may lead to him committing sin regularly and then it will be difficult for him to give up that sin. Rather he should punish himself in a permissible manner just as he would discipline his wife and children. It was narrated that ‘Umar went out to a garden he owned, then he came back and the people had prayed ‘Asr, so he said, “I went out to my garden and when I came back the people had prayed ‘Asr; I give my garden in charity for the poor.” 
And it was narrated that Tameem al-Daari (may Allah be pleased with him) slept one night and did not get up to pray Tahajjud (late night prayer)until dawn came, so he prayed qiyaam al-layl (voluntary night prayers) for a year and did not sleep in order to punish himself for sleeping that night. 
Hassaan ibn Sinaan passed by a room and said, “When was this built?” Then he thought to himself and said, “Are you asking about something that is not your concern? I will punish myself by fasting for a year,” and he fasted that year. 
But with regard to punishments that cause physical harm or involve doing something reprehensible, they are not permissible. It was narrated that a man looked at a woman, then he put his eyes out, and that another disobeyed Allah with his hand, so he put his hand into the fire until it became paralyzed. Such actions are not permissible, and a man cannot treat himself in this way. 
From Mukhtasar Manhaaj al-Qaasideen. 
And Allah knows best.

Question

I am an employee and at work I read Qur’aan when I have nothing else to do. But my boss has forbidden me to do that, saying that this is work time and is not for reading Qur’aan. What is the ruling on that? May Allaah reward you with good.

Praise be to Allah.If you do not have any work, there is nothing wrong with reading Qur’aan, or reciting Tasbeeh (saying Subhaan Allaah) or Tahleel (saying Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah) or other dhikr. That is better than remaining silent. But if your reading is keeping you from doing something that has to do with your work, then it is not permissible for you to do that, because during the time that is specifically for work, it is not permissible for you to keep busy with something that will prevent you from doing your work.

Question

Does by eating camels meat breaks ablution( wudoo ).

Praise be to Allah.The correct view is that the one who eats the meat of a camel old or young, male or female, cooked or raw has to do wudoo. There are several reports which serve as evidence (daleel) for this:


The hadeeth of Jaabir: the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked, Should I do wudoo after eating camel meat? He said, Yes. The person said: Should I do wudoo after eating mutton? He said, If you wish.


(Narrated by Muslim, 360).
The hadeeth of al-Baraa: the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked about eating camel meat. He said, Do wudoo after eating it. He was asked about mutton, and he said, Do not do wudoo.
(Narrated by Abu Dawood, 184; al-Tirmidhi, 81. Classed as saheeh by Imaam Ahmad and Ishaaq ibn Raahawayh).
The view of those who do not regard it as obligatory to do wudoo after eating camel meat is based on several points, such as:


This ruling is mansookh (abrogated). Their evidence (daleel) is:


The hadeeth of Jaabir; the last of the two commands from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was that there was no need to do wudoo after eating food that had been touched by fire.
(Narrated by Abu Dawood, 192; al-Nisaai, 185).
But this does not refute the specific meaning of the hadeeth quoted above from Saheeh Muslim.
Moreover, there is no evidence here of anything being abrogated, because they asked whether they should do wudoo after eating mutton, and he said, If you wish.
If this hadeeth were abrogated, the ruling on mutton would also be abrogated. The fact that he said, If you wish indicates that these ahaadeeth came after the hadeeth of Jaabir.
In cases of abrogation there must be evidence that what is being abrogated came first chronologically, and there is no such evidence here.
Moreover, the hadeeth of abrogation is general in meaning, but this hadeeth (about camel meat) is more specific, and thus excludes (camel meat) from the general ruling.
The fact that he also asked about mutton makes it clear that the issue here is not whether the meat has been touched by fire; if that were the case then camel meat and mutton would be regarded in the same way.
(B) They also take their evidence from the hadeeth, Wudoo has to do with what comes out, not what goes in.
Response:
This hadeeth was narrated and classed as daeef (weak) by al-Bayhaqi (1/116) and al-Daaraqutni (p. 55). It a weak hadeeth with three faults (ilal); for more information see al-Silsilah al-Daeefah, 959.
Even if it were saheeh for the sake of argument it is general in meaning, and the hadeeth which says that wudoo is obligatory (after eating camel meat) is specific.
(C) Some of them said that what is meant by the phrase do wudoo [perform ablution] after eating it is to wash the hands and mouth, because camel meat has an unpleasant odour and is very greasy, unlike mutton!
Response:
This is unlikely, because the apparent meaning here is wudoo as prescribed in shareeah, not ablutions in a linguistic sense (i.e., merely washing one's hands and mouth). It is obligatory to interpret the terminology of shareeah in accordance with the meanings of shareeah.
(D) Some of them take as evidence a story that has no basis; the story in question may be summed up as follows:
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was addressing the people one day, and one of them emitted an odour (i.e., passed wind), but he felt too shy to get up from among the people. He had also eaten camel meat, so the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, covering for him, Whoever has eaten camel meat, let him do wudoo. So a group of people who had eaten camel meat got up and went and did wudoo.
Response:
Shaykh al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
This story has no basis anywhere in the books of Sunnah or elsewhere in the books of Fiqh and Tafseer, as far as I know.
(al-Silsilah al-Daeefah, 3/268).
The correct view regarding this matter is that the ruling on doing wudoo after eating anything that has been touched by fire has been abrogated, but it is obligatory to do wudoo after eating camel meat.
Al-Nawawi said:
Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Ishaaq ibn Raahawayh, Yahyaa ibn Yahyaa, Abu Bakr ibn al-Mundhir and Ibn Khuzaymah thought that it (eating camel meat) breaks wudoo; this was also the view favoured by al-Haafiz Abu Bakr al-Bayhaqi. It was reported from the scholars of hadeeth and from a group of the Sahaabah.
They took as evidence the hadeeth of Jaabir ibn Samurah which was narrated by Muslim. Ahmad ibn Hanbal and Ishaaq ibn Raahawayh said: It has been reported from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in these two saheeh hadeeths, the hadeeth of Jaabir and the hadeeth of al-Baraa. This view has stronger evidence even though the majority follow the opposite.
The majority responded to this with the hadeeth of Jaabir: the last of the two commands from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was that there was no need to do wudoo after eating meat that had been touched by fire. But this hadeeth is general, whereas the hadeeth about doing wudoo after eating camel meat is specific, and a specific ruling takes precedence over a general one.
(Sharh Muslim, 4/49).
Among modern scholars, Shaykh Abd al-Azeez ibn Baaz, Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen and Shaykh al-Albaani also said this.
And Allaah knows best.

Question

I entered the mosque and the imam was sitting for the first tashahhud. I joined him in the prayer, but I forgot whether I said the opening takbeer or not.

Praise be to Allah.The opening takbeer is 
    one of the pillars or essential parts of the prayer, which is not waived 
    because of forgetting or not knowing about it, and it cannot be substituted 
    with anything else. If a person remembers during his prayer that he forgot 
    to say the opening takbeer, or he is not sure whether he said it, he has to 
    start the prayer over again. If his doubt about that comes after the prayer, 
    then it does not matter, because doubts after completing an act of worship 
    do not affect it. 

    Based on this, if the doubt of this worshipper who is not 
    sure whether he said the opening takbeer or not came during the prayer, he 
    has to stop praying and start the prayer over again. If the doubt came after 
    the prayer, then he does not have to do anything and his prayer is valid. 

    The evidence that the opening takbeer is an essential part of 
    the prayer is the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (757) and Muslim (397) from 
    the hadeeth of the one who prayed badly. The Prophet  (peace and 
    blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to him: "Go back and pray, for you 
    have not prayed.” Then he said: “When you stand up to pray, say takbeer then 
    recite whatever you know of the Qur'aan. Then bow until you are at ease in 
    bowing, then stand up until you are standing up straight. Then prostrate 
    until you are at ease in prostration, then sit up until you are sitting up 
    straight, and do that throughout your prayer." 

    And Abu Dawood (61), al-Tirmidhi (3) and Ibn Maajah (275) 
    narrated that 'Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of 
    Allaah  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The key to 
    prayer is purification, its opening is to say Allaahu akbar and its 
    closing is to say al-salaamu’ alaykum.” Classed as saheeh by 
    al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood. 

    Al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 
The opening takbeer is 
    one of the pillars (essential parts) of prayer without which the prayer is 
    not valid. This is our view and the view of Maalik, Ahmad and the majority 
    of earlier and later scholars. Ibn al-Mundhir and our companions narrated 
    that al-Zuhri said: The prayer begins simply with the intention, without any 
    takbeer. But Ibn al-Mundhir said: No one said that except al-Zuhri. 
Then he said: We have 
    stated that the prayer is not valid without the opening takbeer. If the imam 
    or the person praying behind him omits it by mistake or deliberately, his 
    prayer has not begun, and the takbeer for bowing does not make up for it, 
    neither does any other takbeer. This is our view and is the view of Abu 
    Haneefah, Maalik, Ahmad, Dawood and the majority. 

    End quote from al-Majmoo', 3/250 

    Whoever is not sure whether he has said the opening takbeer 
    or not should assume that he has not said it. Shaykh Ibn Baaz said: 

    If a person forgets to say the opening takbeer or is not sure 
    about that, then he has to say takbeer straight away, and follow the imam in 
    whatever comes after he said this takbeer. If he said the takbeer after the 
    imam has done the first rak'ah, then he should regard himself as having 
    missed the first rak'ah, which he should make up after the imam says the 
    salaam. If he said the takbeer in the third rak'ah, then he should regard 
    himself as having missed two rak'ahs, which he should make up after the imam 
    says the salaam. This applies if he is not affected by waswasah (whispers 
    from the Shaytaan). If he is affected by waswasah, then he should regard 
    himself as having said the opening takbeer at the beginning of the prayer, 
    and not make up anything, in order to annoy the Shaytaan and combat his 
    whispers. Praise be to Allaah. End quote. 

    Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 
    11/275 
If the doubt comes after 
    finishing the prayer, then he should not pay any attention to it. 

    Ibn Rajab (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If a person is 
    uncertain after finishing a prayer or any other act of worship as to whether 
    he omitted a essential part of it, he should not pay any attention to that 
    doubt. 

    End quote from al-Qawaa'id, p. 340 

    See also the answer to question no. 
    211 

    And Allaah knows best.

Question

1) What was the last will of Prophet Y’aqub (peace be upon him) for his children before his death? Where do you find this in the Noble Quran?

2)The scripture revealed to Prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him) is lost but it is mentioned in the Noble Quran in different chapters? Give two references from two chapters in the Noble Quran mentioning this scripture.

3)Which country has the highest Muslim population? How did the people of this country become Muslims?

Praise be to Allah.
    1. The Quran indicates that Y’aqub (peace be upon him) gave final 
    instructions to his sons before he died. “… he said unto his sons, ‘What 
    will you worship after me?’ They said, ‘We shall worship your Ilah (God — 
    Allah) the Ilah (God) of your fathers, Ibrahim, Isma‘il, Ishaq, One Ilah 
    (God), and to Him we submit (in Islam).’” [2:133 – interpretation of the 
    meaning].
    2. The scripture of Ibrahim (peace be upon him) is mentioned in Surat 
    al-A’ala 87:19 (interpretation of the meaning): “The Scriptures of Ibrahim 
    and Musa”; and in Surat al-Najm 53:36-37 (interpretation of the meaning): 
    “Or is he not informed with what is in the Pages (Scripture) of Musa (Mose), 
    and of Ibrahim who fulfilled (or conveyed) all that (Allah ordered him to do 
    or convey).” 
    3. The country with the largest Muslim population in Africa is Nigeria, and 
    in Asia, Indonesia. The Indonesians became Muslim through contact with 
    Muslim traders from Hadramawt as is well known. Perhaps this is what the 
    questioner wanted to know, even though the question is not quite clear.

Question

Assalam’alaicum wa rahmatoullahi wa barakatouh
I heard a muslim brother and a imam saying that:
a) People who have children and embrace islam should make a ‘aqiqa for them
(the children), no matter how old they are and also one for themselves
because their non-muslim parents did not make one for them;

b) Making a ‘aqiqa is so important that if one doesn’t have the money to
make it, he should borrow that money.

However, they didn’t give any references to prove what they said. What is
the truth?

Praise be to Allah.wa aliaikum us-salaam wa-rahmat ullaahi wa-barakaatuh.

al-hamdu lillaah.


(a) Jumhoor al-ulemaa' (vast majority of the scholars) agree that the
aqeeqa is a sunnah mustahabbah for those who are capable of doing it and
can afford it.  Among its benefits are breaking the influence of the
shaitaan on the new-born.  It is also permissible for a Muslim to make an
aqeeqah for himself if his parents did not perform it for him.  Similarly,
he can do it for his children even if it is after many years if he didn't
do it when they were young. 

Refer to the book "Tuhfat ul-Mawdood bi-Ahkaam il-Mawlood" by Imam Ibn
ul-Qayyim, Chapter 6: "The Aqeeqah and its Rulings", Part 19: "The Ruling
for One Whose Parents Did Not Perform an Aqeeqah--Should He Perform one on
His Own Behalf?" for more details.  It is mentioned there that Ismaa'il ibn
Sa'eed al-Shaalanji  asked (Imam) Ahmed regarding a man whose father
informed him that he did not perform an aqeeqah on his behalf--should he
perform it on his own behalf?  He said, 

"That is the father's duty." ...

and it was said, "Should one perform an aqeeqah on his own behalf as an
adult?"  ... and I saw that it is preferrable if an aqeeqah was not
performed as a child then it should be performed as an adult, and (Imam
Ahmed) said:
"If someone does that I would not discourage it or regard it as
reprehensible." 

(b) It is not mandatory for a person to take a loan in order to spend on an
aqeeqah.  However, if he does it then it would be considered commendable as
per Imam Ahmed's opinion.  It was related by Abi il-Harith that he asked
Abu Abdullah regarding one who doesn't have enough to perform an aqeeqah;
Imam Ahmed said, 
"If he borrowed for it I hope Allaah would reward and
provide for him by virtue that he has observed a sunnah." 

Refer to "Tuhfat il-Mawdood," same chapter, Part 11: "Regarding Borrowing
for an Aqeeqah and its Rulings and Benefits."

Question

I know that it is haram to read horoscopes as only ALLAH knows what the future holds for us and since I have found this out, I have, Alhamdu Lilah, stopped reading my horoscope. 
Is dream interpretation also haram or is it allowed?  I dreamt that I was kidnapped and then I also dreamt that an aunt of mine who was eating curried crab gave me a hug. 
The internet has a website on interpretation of dreams and me being kidnapped means that I will be put in an embarrassing situation and the hug from my aunt means that I will lose my lover.  Is this true? Can you please comment?

Praise be to Allah.Are horoscopes haram?
Astrology , horoscopes, superstition and fortune-telling are all actions of ignorance which Islam came to show as false and to explain that they are acts of polytheism. This is because they involve depending on something other than Allah and believing that benefit and harm come from something other than Him, and believing the words of fortune-tellers and soothsayers who falsely claim to have knowledge of the unseen in order to cheat people of their money and change their beliefs. 
Evidence for prohibiting zodiac signs in Islam
The evidence for that is the hadith narrated by Abu Dawud in his Sunan with a sahih isnad from Ibn 'Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him), that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever learns anything of astrology has learned a branch of witchcraft (al-sihr)…” 
Al-Bazzar narrated with a sound chain of transmission from ‘Imran ibn Husayn that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “He is not one of us who practises augury or has it done for him, who tells fortunes or has his fortune told, or who practises witchcraft or has that done for him.” Whoever claims to know some matter of the unseen either is a fortune-teller or is acting like a fortune-teller in some sense, because Allah is the only One Who has knowledge of the unseen. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning);
“Say: ‘None in the heavens and the earth knows the Ghayb (Unseen) except Allah…’” [al-Naml 27:65]
How to avoid fortune-telling
My advice to everyone who has anything to do with these matters is to repent to Allah and ask for His forgiveness, and to depend only on Allah and to put their trust in Him in all their affairs, whilst following the practical means that are prescribed or permitted in shari’ah. They should give up these matters of jahiliyyah, keep away from them and avoid asking the people who practise them or believe what they say, out of obedience to AllahAllah and His Messenger (peace and blessings of AllahAllah be upon him), and in order to protect his commitment to Islam and his ‘aqidah (religious belief).
And Allah knows best.

Question

My husband likes to invite people all the time in our house. this causes me a great deal of inconvenience and upsets me as it takes out of our private time as a couple. to what extent we are obliged to our guests? and what is our rights and responsibilities towrads our guests in islam?.

Praise be to Allah.It was narrated that Abu Shurayh al-‘Adawi 
    said: I heard with my own two ears and I saw with my own two eyes when the Prophet  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) spoke and 
    said: “Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him honour his neighbour; whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him honour his 
    guest as he is entitled.” It was said, ‘What is his entitlement, O Messenger of Allaah?” He said, “[The best treatment] for one day and one night; 
    and hospitality is for three days, and anything after that is charity bestowed upon him. And whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him, 
    speak good words or else remain silent.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5560; Muslim, 69. This version was narrated by al-Bukhaari. 
The guest has rights, as the Prophet  
    (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said. There should be no doubt about this matter. If guests come without being invited, they should be 
    honoured, as the Prophet  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said. 
Yes, if they are bad friends or are those who 
    have nothing better to do and impose themselves on others all the time, then they should be treated in a manner that befits them, because they 
    annoy the people with their actions.  
But if it is your husband who is inviting a 
    lot of people to your house, then in this case you should speak to him in a gentle manner, and come to an agreement about how to invite people, so 
    that he will not invite anyone without speaking to you first, and you can agree to reduce the number of invitations in a suitable manner. 
You – may Allaah bless you – should not 
    express displeasure to your husband when the guests are there, because this is something that will make matters worse and will not solve the 
    problem. You have to be patient, because patience is the key to finding a way out. 
Strive to create a calm atmosphere in your 
    house, with good words and kind treatment. Some husband may resort to inviting a lot of friends over in an effort to relax, because their wives 
    may not be good at creating an atmosphere that suits their husbands, so that makes them look for this atmosphere with their friends. So try to 
    understand your husband’s nature so that you can create a suitable atmosphere that will make him happy and relaxed, which is what is he is looking 
    for with his friends. 
We ask Allaah to set things straight between 
    you, and to help you to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.

Question

My question is regarding the suppression of
sexual desires. In this country, at this age, it is very difficult not to get aroused
several times a day. I hope you can understand. This causes stress while praying because a
drop or two may come out and during the whole prayer I am worried about it. Also, it
delays my performing the prayer. You said masturbation is not allowed. And you mentioned
fasting. Due to my circumstances fasting voluntary fasts regularly is not feasible as it
makes me too tired to study and concentrate. Also I am not able to marry now. This
situation might continue for years if Allah grants me that long a life. Can I therefore
castrate myself or take drugs that suppress sexual desires? I think the good that such a
measure would do will outweigh the harm and make me steadfast in my prayer and
concentration.But I wanted your advice before I take any steps .

Praise be to Allah.Fasting is not only a remedy, it is also a purification of
    the soul and a means of earning reward and the pleasure of Allaah. It is also a striving
    against one’s desires. With a little patience and the hope of earning reward, one can
    get used to fasting. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Observing As-Sawm (the fasting) is prescribed for you as it was
    prescribed for those before you, that you may become Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)”
    [al-Baqarah 2:183]
In the Tafseer of this aayah it was said that according to one opinion,
    the phrase “that you may become al-muttaqoon” means: that you may stay
    away from sin, because fasting is more of a deterrent and is more effective in keeping one
    from falling into sin. This is one of the meanings of the hadeeth, “Let him fast for
    that will be a protection for him.” Many people think that this is because fasting
    weakens the body and thus weakens desire. Even if that is the case, it is in addition to
    the fact that fasting motivates a person to keep away from anything that he fears may
    affect him adversely, either because of the blessing of the fast itself or because if the
    one who is fasting has to refrain from food and drink that are permissible, it is even
    more appropriate that he should keep away from things which are forbidden.
Fataawa al-Subki, part 1: al-Siyaam: Hifz al-Siyaam
    ‘an Fawt al-Tamaam
When young people who are unable to marry were commanded to fast, this is
    a sign of the wisdom and insight of the Lawgiver. It is clear that fasting has an effect
    in this regard and that it helps to control desire and reduce provocation.
With regard to your question about taking medication that can reduce
    desire, there is no reason why you cannot take some herbal extracts etc. to control your
    desires, so long as they are not harmful in any way. But this will not be of much help if
    you do not do some acts of worship to fill your time and other activities to use up your
    physical energy, such as Da’wah activities and helping those in need. Also reduce
    your intake of rich foods, do some sports activities, keep yourself busy with useful
    things, and make yourself a schedule that will use up your excess physical energy. Do not
    forget that it is also very important to keep away from sources of provocation. Be
    optimistic and do not think that you will remain in this situation for many years. May
    Allaah make it easy for you to marry soon. May He protect us and you from evil and guide
    us to the Straight Path.